philos
liberté
princeps
memoria

There have been many people who messaged me or sent emails to ‘console’ me & to reassure me after reading my goodbye entry. This entry here is dedicated to those people, who have shown me how passion makes a person, & how by reaching for that dream, & remaining true to myself, I can achieve. This is for those who truly made me feel special, & who faithfully reassured me & trusted me no matter what. This is for those who showed me that my 2 years in this high school was not something that can just be forgotten easily, & who showed me the true meaning of friendship. Thank you, friends.

(Word-for-word)

SMS:
“hey cherm. Felt so bad I wasn’t dere on sat with u.. having a friend leave is going to be painful, but I noe leaving ur friends would be twice as bad. Whenever u’re feeling low.. remember u alwaes haf us. We’ll stand by u… alwaes. Remember to drop by as often.. will miss you veri, veri much……….”

“hey girl.. we’ll always remember your valued contributions to the choir. All the best for your future k.. have a great year.. visit us whenever you’re free k? you know you’re always welcomed back. Keep reaching for your dreams! They are nearer than you can imagine.. love ya…”

Email:
“chermaine, my dearest, you seriously need to put a tagboard on your site so people can show how much they love you...
to less mirthful matters... what other way is there to put it, but simply? I cried when I read your blog entry... and I hate myself for having to go for the re-exam, because otherwise I could have spent more time with you, with the choir, and instead I was bumming around in LT2 waiting for the stupid paper to end...
I don't have much to say... and what I feel can't be put into words... but your Tarzan song has put into perspective what all the choristers feel... you'll always be welcome back, whether to scold or just to listen in...
"Coz you'll be in my heart, believe me you'll be in my heart I'll be there from this day on, now and forever more"
"Just look over your shoulder, I'll be there always" love you...”

These are the little bits here & there. But they basically sum up everything everyone else has written/ said. Thank you for supporting my decision, guys. I’ve been blessed because I have you people. I’ll reach for my dreams, and meanwhile, you’ll always be in my heart. From this day on,
now,
& forever more..

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Today was the last time spent with NYchoir, & my beloved choristers. Like Kai Xuan said, "This will truly change the course of my 'destiny' ". We sang 3 final songs for the year 2003- Somewhere Out There, Thank You For The Music, & Let It Shine. I think that our singing of Somewhere Out There was the best time we have ever sang the song, probably because we really sang it with feeling & emotions, like Val & Cherie told us to. Lilin reminded me (& everyone else) that that was to be the final time we would be singing together, & we couldn't let that chance slip away.

Seniors, juniors & peers hugged me, patted me on the back, gave me little (but really nice) things, shook my hand, and said their goodbyes. It was one of the saddest times of my life. (My 2nd saddest was saying goodbye to primary school pals.) Then kx, lilin, cherlyn, Joanna, Kerr & me sat around the grand piano & sang Somewhere Out There one last time. My voice really wobbled around, & I crossed my arms to maybe stop the tears. Nothing helped. When I hugged kx, the tears just flowed down. They are a part of me, my singing buddies, & I know I'll never forget them. Shao Ning warned me not to "dao" them when I see them around, & this is not the first time I've heard that. I'll never ever "dao" anyone! & if I just pass by without saying "hello", it 's because I truly didn't see anyone, so don't misunderstand!

One of the choristers, who happens to be a senior who loves to tease me as much as I like to tease her, sms-ed me. I want to type it out, word-for-word cos it's quite sweet. (There! I've admitted already!)

Senior (whose identity I'll remain secret) :
" hey.. all the best for your new year in the new school.. God bless you in all you do & don be too sad & don miss me too much. Haha. Ok, see u around some another day ya. U go girl.. okok admit I WILL miss u alittleweenybit haha.. you may not noe it but u have been quite an encouragement to me. Haha. Cos I love teasing u. Smile more k. & don keep on bullyin nice people like me. Bet u are so touched now u wanna give me x'mas present. Haha. Ok.. love ya.."

Thanks dear senior. & that message was 8 screens long. =0

Went to Westmall with kx. Before that we just sat at the back of the bus & listened to the cd I got for her. It was so, so sad! We were both crying at the back of the bus, listening to Tarzan's You'll Be In My Heart. I'll never forget that horribly sad & bittersweet moment.

I cannot believe it is really all over, that I will never be able to go back to my 2nd home (M3-01) again, except visits. What's worst is that I'll never be a part of this fantastic, international gold choir, a choir which can overcome all the odds & difficulties that we faced together, a choir with great leadership & super lame jokes, a choir with people so different, yet so similar. Singing brought this choir together, & it's only through singing that we'll have that bond. I'll miss you, Nychoir, & I know that beyond any doubt, Nychoir will shine bright & strong, always.

But I'll have the memories, & I won't let them go.

You'll Be In My Heart
"When destiny calls you,
you must be strong.
I may not be with you,
But you've got to hold on.

You'll be in my heart, believe me, from this day on, now & forever more. You'll be here in my heart, no matter what they say.
I'll be there always. . "

Goodbye choir, & thank you for the memories.




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[25th Dec: my fav. time of the year.]
MERRY CHRISTMAS friends!

What is Christmas really all about?



Often we think of glittering gifts & such
A time for gaity & cheers we desire much.
Christmas is truly a time for celebration
Though for a special reason many have forgotten.


Christmas is Christ came for us
Amidst this world of violence, pain & greed,
Where men lust for power, & scorn those in need.
While we are plunging deeper into sins,
Only Christ could save us now.


God’s love for us is the reason for the season:
He sent True Light to
shine into every darken heart.
Thru Christ' s death on the cross. He freely imparts
Eternal lifeto all who receive Him into their hearts
For He has fully paid for all our sins by His blood.


May God bless you richly this Christmas with the fullness of His Joy, Peace, & Love that comes truly through Jesus Christ who alone is the Eternal Hope for our Future.

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Short Msg II: Just finished Christmas shopping. Whew! & I managed to keep it under $800 this time! >.<
The main place my family & I went was Great World City. There's Esprit, U2, Montip, Hallmark, Christian Bookshop, & lots of little shops here & there. Spent most of the time in Esprit though. They have stocked up lots of X'mas wears! Very suitable for older cousins. We were suppose to watch LOTR later on, but mum spent so lonnng in those shops we didn't have enough time. Sigh. Next time maybe. It was really funny the way my bro, sis & dad went about whispering "So what to get for mummy?". We ran round all the shops trying to find something she liked, & when I suggested this Esprit blouse set, my sis checked the price & almost fainted. (It's too big a number so I won't type it here.) Obviously we didn't buy it, & had to settle for something else. Then we realised that dad didn't have anything either, & so we had to run around to get his present. I looked around Barang Barang until I realised that we should get him something Christian, & not some little nicknack. -.-

I bargained with my sis. I won't buy her anything if she wouldn't, that why we both save some $$. =D
I'll end here. Going to watch The Christmas Wish on 5. I was hooked the moment there was this joke about "NO GSTTTT.." sung out. XD
Listening to Gloria Gaynor's I Will Survive. Survival is necessary during one of the busiest shopping times of my life. -__-"'

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Short msg: Did some changes to my template. It's suppose to look all Christmas-sy, with that colourful X'mas lights as the picture & colours that match the season- green, red, black. It's pretty simple, cos I'm rushing to watch Phua Chu Kang showing now. I don't usually watch it, but my bro is laughing himself to death, so i'll just pop over to take a look. (Chu Beng just went "I'm sexier than you".) >.< Hmmm.

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She's now a CHIJ Convent girl. What can I say.
God never works without purpose or plan. And I believe that. Always have.

Denise was so nice. Gave me & mei reasons to work for. She went "*pat your shoulder*", and I felt it. =] That sms really cheered me up! Thanks girl. You were always one good at all the comforting.

I'm pretty sick now. A really bad headache, flu-ish nose & the beginnings of a fever.*Prays hard* It's been 3 days in a row when I've met people who are all sick. First it was one of my friends (can't really remember who) who was coughing around, then it was my math tuition teacher sniffling about, & finally a whole day today with lilin & kx, who is still coughing & sneezing her life away. >.< Get well, people!

This headache is behaving in a funny way. It starts with the back part of my head, then it moves forward and sort of swims around my brain. If it doesn't kill me I don't know what will. I think I'm partly to blame. Instead of moving about, running here & there going places, I should have just concentrated on getting well first. Hrump. Maybe this rock music is to be blamed too. Oasis & Matchbox 20 are not exactly the quietest of bands.

So, to accomodate my headache, I'll change the background music the Matchbox 20's Unwell. To hear it, turn up speakers.

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Just remembered. Tomorrow's the Sec. School Posting Day for all Pri 6-es. Go mei! I'll be praying for everyone.

Activities for me

Watched Love Actually with a couple of friends on Tuesday; Kx, Vicky, Lincoln, Mitchell & Jingwen. The movie was quite nice, esp. that rock star person singing & saying all the wrong things at the wrong times! My fav. part was the time when this actor proposed to the Portuguese lady at a cafe. He said all the wrong things translated. I was laughing like crazy! "I will inhibit with you or you can inhibit with me" or something along that line. *gape* That part was hilarious.

We went to the cinema at orchard (can't remember the name). The movie theater was 1/4 full, & the boys were loud. Seriously. They had all sorts of comments to make, & were laughing at don't-know-what every don't-know-when. Kx had to do some "shhhh"-ing. =D Then kx had this urge or something for salted popcorn (the girls were eating the honey-sweet ones.). The salted ones were at the boys' end (I think with Mitchell or something), so I was like, "Psst! Lincoln! Get Kx that salted popcorn!". And I suppose it was a funny part of the movie, cos he was like, "huh?! this aint the time for an exchange of popcorn!". -.-

After that we ate lunch at can't remember where. >.< But I had beef noodles, intro-ed by Vicky. And I actually finished the whole bowl. I couldn't believe it! I never finish cos I always share a meal with my family, esp. rice or noodle dishes! I was so full I couldn't eat dinner. Then we went Isetan to say hi to Kx's sis. She's working there part time. Cool. =) Day ended there.

19th Dec: Went with kaixuan to esplanade concert hall to enjoy the delightful Christmas concert music by the SSO. Ms. Ng gave JC & me the tix to watch it, but JC had percussion camp! Tough luck! So Ms. Ng siad I had better call someone else along. . Hope you enjoyed it Kx! Missed Jc. =|

The Nutcracker Suite was really fantastic. It got KX & me tapping to the beat! I could really imagine ballerinas dancing on stage, gliding around. And we enjoyed the sing-a-long the most! I think we were one of the most enthusiastic participants there, with kx harmonising along! Joy to the world.. Hark now hear the angels sing.. Jingle bells.. Wow.

I had a mini 6A gathering at the ice-skating rink. It was a 4 guys, 4 girls thing, and it was fun cos we could skate around the rink real quickly and play catching/tag, just like last time! It was girls catch guys, like the usual. We could catch Zhi Yong, Ann Liang & even Shi Xian (though he was really fast) a couple of times, but we just couldn't catch Eugene! Every time we managed to corner him, he'll just smash into the dividers and scoot off the other way, leaving me screaming and slamming into the wall (ouch!). I was afraid to brake, and afraid that when ting pushed him, he'll fall or something, so we just tried the gentle way. Ultimately we did manage to, lucky for us, smashing someone's ego down. >.< I like ice skating, & maybe someday, I'll be able to do crossovers while skating backwards. I'll take it one step at a time.

After that, they went to watch a movie somewhere in orchard, & I went shopping for my bro's birthday present & party stuff. We were thinking of making our own birthday cake, & I must admit Cherene, Annabel & me did a pretty good job, judging by the number of helpings my bro's friends had. It's still his b'day today!!! The party is just over. Mum's cleaning up now, and Clement has some of the weirdest & nicest presents on earth. It's ranging from that nice, hippy-type water bottle, to a Metal Slug X game, to Literature books by George Eloit & Charles Dickens. The books go to me though, cos he doesn't really like Lit. books! (Yay!) XD

They are watching Brainest Teen now, & all I can hear is Cheryl Fox's "That's correct... That's correct.. ". Smart people. =)

Listening to the song Last Christmas.
= Last Christmas, I gave you my heart. But the very next day, you gave it away... This year, to save me from tears, I'm giving it to someone special... =

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False Dawn

It was a false dawn today. The weather deceived everyone. To go out, I wore my white jacket & I had my share of weird looks. Maybe it was cos everyone was wearing short-sleeved attire & such, & I had a jacket on. But back on topic, nothing would have possessed me to do that if it wasn't such a windy weather. And there was a weak sunshine, and strong wind! In fact, the sunshine actually felt cold. It was just like in Australia. That's what I call false dawn. Fake sunshine.

I am constantly struck by the kindness I see on the mrt train. Everytime an elderly person or a pregnant lady comes aboard, someone would always never fail to 'surrender' their seat. It happened again today. Touching really.

Met Sean on my way home. I was busy chewing on squid from old chang kee to notice that he was kind of ignoring me. It was fortunate I said hi, if not both of us would just have walked pass each other like strangers. I don't know why, but somehow that doesn't really appeal much. Hrump. Glad he responded at least, so we can just stay as friends & not *looks away*.

I am currently on MSN with this person, & he's kind of getting peeved at me, just like I am getting really peeved at him. I don't mean angry, just half of that. I must try to contain my "peevish-ness" lest I should make enemies over MSN! Well, you win some, you lose some. .

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Sec4 Farewell Party

I think I'm in no position to judge how well the party went, but from what I saw, facilitating the you-can-die-from-it game with Kai Xuan was really f.u.n. We had to run around the whole admin. & classroom block to shout "jia you"s to all the players, and after that, we simply collapsed in exhaustion in M3-01. And then when everyone left to eat the fantastic lunch (planned by Kimberly & Kerryn!) we just lay down on the floor to catch our breaths. Finally we discovered Val "hiding" in M3-C2, and spooking us like crazy. Finally, we trudged down to the canteen, all thanks to Val for singing Charlotte Church's Dream A Dream.

The funniest part of the day was lunch, most probably cos I was sitting with all-time wacky people- Kerryn, Mel, Corinna, Kai Xuan, & myself. We sat apart from the rest cos there wasn't enough space, and then the super lame & corny jokes started flying about. Let's see, I was most shocked about Corinna's Austin Powers imitation, and everyone actually went "huh??!" at her. And then, I don't know for what reason, but we started thinking about a name to call ourselves, cos we felt that we were acting a comedy. I thought of '5 friends & the lunch', which recieved the most number of rolled eyes. Then KX came up with something that goes with '3 men & a baby', & Kerryn went "Huh? Where's the baby?!" And I think we most probably had lamity-overdose, cos we actually crackled with laughter over that corny comment.

After some other corny jokes, I did something that makes me go *tut tut* now. For our dessert, we had some sweet watery thing with nata de coco. Because Corinna was so nice as to get me another bowl, I tried hard to finish it, but before I could eat those delightful nata de coco, Kerryn actually took the bowl from me to pass it to seniors near by! I flipped, & just shrieked "Don't take my white things!!!" And everyone just stared. >.< I don't know what came over me, & how come I couldn't remember what it was called, but yeah, that's what I said. And I don't know why, but everybody (at the table) started laughing like there was no tomorrow. -__-' And Kerryn said she would dedicate her blog entry to (her exact words) Chermaine & her white things, but Corinna said it sounded crude. XD And then someone said something which made KaiXuan 'throw out' her fruit punch already in her mouth. *eww* =D But it was really, really wacky, & very very fun. Nice memories there.

Another fun bit was the captain's ball. The Facilitators group (my grp) played against Corinna's, the winning one. And although we had 3 less players, we won 7:4 !!! Yay! Kimberly was the captain, & she was amazing! She could close her eyes & scream & catch the ball I threw to her! I was like, "KIM! OPEN YOUR EYES!" but she just extended her arms to hopefully catch a ball. And we won in this manner. Wow.

So the day ended. Like it always has to. *sob* BUT we have the memories! Ours to keep, forever.

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Just read 'Doomed Queen Anne', by Carolyn Meyer. For the die-hard romantics out there, it wasn't a love story at all. I have this deep-rooted liking for Victorian / Elizabethean history, like about Henry VIII, who had about 5 wives & just discarded them one by one like rags. Feminism today would have prevented that. And I feel sick just by reading those bits about "but the Queen could never speak against the king". Big deal. Women these days would just kick butt. =X Oops.

Anne Boleyn was one of the king's wives, and they say she bewitched him. I rolled my eyes on that one. As if the 'all-powerful' king can be bewitched by a "mere woman". It's an excuse for his want of taste and refinement if you ask me. She lived to 1536, & I was super shocked when I realised she was beheaded. The Queen of England was beheaded. For treason! And her husband was waiting for her death so that he could marry another! I developed a headache just by thinking of it. And 10 days after she was 'killed', Henry VIII married Jane Seymour, who gave birth to future king Edward. His lack of love & respect never fails to amaze me. Those people in those times must have lived interesting & hurt-filled lives.

His last wife was Catherine Parr. Nice lady, from what historians seem to imply. Anne's daughter Elizabeth became Queen soon after, and ruled for 45 years. Yay!~ Finally, a woman to rule instead of those kings who are so fickle I don't think they should even have wives.

15th - 16th century history is certainly very interesting once you get to know it.

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