philos
liberté
princeps
memoria

"Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art..
It has no survival value;
rather, it is one of those things that give value to survival."
-C.S. Lewis

I met soomeh and tanneh on saturday for breakfast at delifrance before we went to rj for open house..


the tantilising display..




It is also very like soomeh to pose with the chilli shaker. Why am I not surprised..


This is the ultra sweet surprise they gave me!! It's a survival kit, packed with all the fattening, feel-good candies and chocolates, and a mini joke book to help me get over certain realisations.. It was so pretty, and I was very very touched. Thank you guys.




I think tanneh looks unbearably cute here.. Entirely out of character I'm sure, judging by what she said to sooneh and me today after school! ;) I shall not publicly type it here. Tanneh you owe me.
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The days go by, and we spend our time finishing our options, studying chinese, counting hours till school ends.. I wonder how I'll feel, on 4th nov, when I have to say my goodbyes, and then look back at the last few weeks of my school life, and regret.

Regrets are painful. They are unlike sorrow, because sorrow will diminish with time, but the regrets only get heavier and heavier.. They never lose their stronghold over you, and they grow with every regret added, with every tear cried, with every hug left un-hugged...

I'll move on to another stream of thought then, this is getting all too depressing.

Through certain things which have happened thus far, I've suddenly realised that there is always a limit to how much we can take, and with greater relevance, how much we pretend to take.

It's so terrible how it took such a huge amount of volatile emotions to finally realise what has been all these years. Was I really so blind, or am I then a coward, choosing pathetic blindess over crushing reality, I will really never know.

But one thing I do know, is that I may never be the same again. And can you blame me?

I really wonder how many will try to side-guess this entry, to either fit certain events..

This will probably work out the way it really should, and then it will be time to say our au reviors and move along..

But beneath the dense canopy of what is, and what has been, we can neither see our reflections in the lake, nor hear the silent murmur of the wind beneath the leaves from the pages of Past.

And when we realise, beyond any doubt, that anything that has rightly started, has ended, we will be, once again,

free.

so give me liberty or give me death. Either waxed wings to fly, or I will drown in the sea of self-delusion, with a hopeless illusion of freedom. I cannot keep playing games with myself, becaause I can never win. Then again, not losing isn't such a bad thing either. Perhaps I will always be caught in this fanatical carousel, always playing the same tune, round and round and round again, never stopping, never thinking, never loving,

never knowing.


me and my dearest bro and sis.. Random yes, but I love them all the same. At least I have a constant in life, at least I have people who still believe in me, even I don't know who "me" really is.

When it rains, it pours.
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