philos
liberté
princeps
memoria

Am not in a very super mood now and I have no idea why.

I guess the whole week hasn't been easy on anyone. I've been doing last minute crams until 12am, and then I can't fall asleep, and when I do, it's only to dream. And the dreams are so real, it's scary and sometimes a little upsetting.


Me thinks it has quite a lot to do with the discussion I had after k-boxing today with 2 of my fav people-
yeah, that one. Sometimes I think when we hit rock bottom and get serious reality checks.. Just ouch.


Really. ouch.


---- cts ----
Ogay cts are over. I'm quite a pro at the selective learning thingy haha. For example, I didn't bother with lit cos after all it's passage-based, and then for econs I bothered to study EOS simply cos it was the last topic. Spot on I say.

I thank God.


Let me proceed to illustrate my studying journey. Hoho this is fun.


monster brownie for sustenance. hehe.


melted red ruby is delightful.


I have almost finished the whole packet of haribo gummy bears from germany. yay.



my mild obsession with rainbow-coloured bread!




I love breakfast at borders' cafe! (: A little pricy though..




gramps n gran!



I am fascinated. Gran's ring is big.

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Ok, Randomness from here on..


- My hp bill is bombed. I sent almost 250 smses in a week. My mum will own me.

- I've got a billion things to do. I don't know where to start.

- My pelvis really really really hurts. I don't know what I'm going to do. I hate painkillers.

- No whining allowed.

- Someone said something that made me think and think and think. (surprise!) And it hurt. Call it riding an emo rollercoaster that I really want to get off, but the safety harness is jammed..

- The past is inching forward. I realise that I haven't actually moved on. I haven't let go. Yucks.


Wow. somebody's pensive.

On another note, thanks smoot tanneh for a great time. Again. As always. Loves you very very muchly.


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And I stand amazed. I stand in awe. I stand forgiven in the midst of it all. Before You I bow, before You I fall. Sweet saviour of all.


I've got someone to rely on, through it all.

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I'm sitting here with five million other things to do, listening to Blind by Lifehouse, drinking oat milk and eating cookies.

Life is good, besides the lit cts tomorrow which is really kewl and weird funny haha because I have yet to finish reading Great Ex oh well. I must really push myself out of this laziness that has become a second nature and do something about that dying organism up there which I fondly term Brain.

Brain chooses not to work at opportunate moments, like during geog tests, when as a basic geog-er, one is required to know certain things like maps. Brain likes to do weird things at bad times, like blogging when I should go read about cleopatra and her drama, or octavius with his ridiculous thirst for power.

Brain refuses to be practical and go sleep, because tomorrow's paper is three long hours.

Listen to angsty songs, and one becometh angsty. This is my Law of Duh-ism.

Happy SEVENTEENTH sumae! (:

Now that? That's happiness..

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HELP ME.

I'm drowning in this mess of work undone. I feel so inept and useless and unbelievably stupid. I don't know how I'm going to look at myself when I get my results back. And really, this is all my own fault.

It's just me. I'm lazy. Very. And now I'm reeling from the effects of not studying. You'd think I would be used to the last minute mugging.

I vaguely remember my EOYs in sec2. I fell asleep on the table doing last minute revision on ionic bonding. The night / morning before. My chem scored ok, and I almost failed physics, my favourite science. Isn't that depressing. I can be so unbelievably dumb sometimes.

So really. If I crash for my first ever CTs, my sis is so going to laugh in my face. And I would deserve every bit of it.

But then again, failure is really just the absence of success.

Ha. Oh well, you win some, and you lose some. Such is the irony of life.

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I told my mum, I've lost that momentum to study. All that's left now is just the urge to relax and rest my little wee brain. And to have as much fun and rest as I can possibly have for this june holidays, cos the next time the june hols come, it probably won't be any fun anymore.

Sacrifices have to be made. So which will it be...

I should erm, probably study now. But come to think of it, maybe more resting..

Oh well.
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I think it's good once in a while to step back and see your world in pictures. Picture viewing does, in some obscure way, incur great opportunity cost. And looking at Past could mean forgetting Present, but who cares anyhow. I shall adopt teddy's philosophy of heckcarism just for the moment.


random pigging out moments on monday! (:


don't look like studying does it..


sure whatever.






this is somethingood (:


banana mocha frap is something better hehe


boyle and hans's support: my two drummers!


sara rocks a lot a lot!



this is mr melon man. (wally I finally gave it a name. thanks! hehe)


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At smoot's attic now pigging out and talking and pigging out and pseudo-studying. It is nice and cold and non-conducive for studying but who cares you only live once. So there. (:

Tanneh's playing with the purple hulahoop. She sucks at it. Haha. Tanneh is studying she refuses to blog.

Hello this is secretive smoot. Because I am secretive, i shall not tell you who i am. Hooray! Cher is being stoopit. I am bored and sleepy. And I am tired of marginal cost curves and variable cost curves. Mumble. Mumble.

cher: who cares about long run short run anyway. It's only important when you're a tracker. Otherwise, walk don't run please. ;)

Does anyone want a u-zap? (says smoot)

Wow cher is a pro at the hoolahooop tanneh and i are not impressed because she is using a wave-hoop which is just cheater.

loves.

And the madness ends here. Haha.
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Clara Chua's great earring designs! Go here please. (:

Busking for Somethingood on monday! Woot.
And hehe thanks tanneh for letting me mumble and grumble on msn. Michael Buble rocks lah. ;)

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Girls' Night Out at paragon and swensens, which was ultimate fun-ness! Pictures are still hidden in camera.. Thanks sarahs smoot! muahhs.

Class sleepover: 2 hours of sleep, lots of suanning, singing, snacking. Truth n Dare as usual, more random talk after that, then exhaustion sets in and we fall dead in slumber. Now I'm just functioning on sugar from my cookie.

Pre-u sem outing! The ice-skating that didn't happen, because I forgot to call my doc to ask if I were allowed to ice skate. Oh sigh. Those Silent Hill people were seriously creeped out (: Pictures of Teddy's bravery up next.

watch this space.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I don't want to talk about it.

A glance. But there are too many words.

I'm giving up on everything because it's all so messed up. Really.

Someone should do the listening. But we're all speaking- so loudly. We're all screaming. Have you forgotten? There's no point in thinking of yesterday. It's too late now, we will never be the same.

Find yourself, because I can't find you.

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Church service today really opened my eyes and heart to all I've been missing, and as the tears flowed freely, the whole youth prayed for pastor cuixian, pastor ronald and pastor matthew, for my youth leaders and my dear cell mates Grace, Deborah, Elissa, and I felt that struggle inside. I prayed for Grace during alter call- for strength and faith, and when she prayed for me, she found the right barrier I was facing.

A burden.

This heavy burden that I have been carrying.. The need to know more, to praise Him wholeheartedly, without this barricade, this obstacle hindering me.

Sara lent me Counting Crowns Lifesong, and there's this great song Set me free.

Set me free of the chains holding me. That is so true.

The Holy Spirit works in miraculous ways, and He touches our hearts in ways so mysterious, yet so right, so real.

Mum says God will tell me to pack my 2 week mess in the room, and Pastor ronald told us never to be sunday christians, and that we should be good children to our parents, like respecting them and cleaning the room.

My mum says she prophesized it. She is a little scary I must say. (:

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I think I should stop stuffing my face, but I think I can't help it. It has come to a point when 9 friends have begun mentioning this saddening piece of information, the last being yesterday when Boyle decided to tell me and sara that we weren't the "right type" cos we were eating glorious dessert and prata. Too bad. ;)

Let's see. During pre-u seminar there were new friends who were amazed at the amount of food I ate, but hey, it was a buffet hello. I was "stuffing my face again?" and all that. Haha.

And hercules ain't that nice either..

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to mind? says:
how's your post-pre u sem life?

cher. ; i'll never be the same says:
still sickly

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to mind? says:
from?

cher. ; i'll never be the same says:
was sick during pre u sem what

cher. ; i'll never be the same says:
cough flu

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to mind? says:
you looked fine then

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to mind? says:
and had quite a healthy appetite!

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to mind? says:
haha

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to mind? says:
take care

cher. ; i'll never be the same says:
HEY!!! healthy appetite?!

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to mind? says:
haha

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to mind? says:
no la

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to mind? says:
joking

cher. ; i'll never be the same says:
you are like the eight person who talks about that ): my other friend ask me why i keep eating non stop

cher. ; i'll never be the same says:
then another say i'm always stuffing my face

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to mind? says:
aiyah dun worry

cher. ; i'll never be the same says:
so depressing man

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to mind? says:
our frankness stems from our faith in you!! its not as if you're fat

Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to mind? says:
eat more lah.. get well faster

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

righttt..

Ok never mind I am just being weird and nonsensical. 060606 is over. ):

I shall watch Charlie and the Choc Factory to brighten up the day again.

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Today was a cool day, besides the cold rain. Sara's cool place, Grey's anatomy, phish food!, electric guitar, JAMMING, piano, beethoven's life story, I PASSED MY THEORY 8 (now no one needs to punch me), steamed egg for dinner, Fahrenheit 9/11 soon.

All cool.

060606. We'll have to wait another century for this one eh? Won't be too difficult. Just cut down on the self-inflicted stress, greasy food, late nights and unhealthy blogging and it'll all go well and good.

have a nice life. (:

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Pre- University Seminar


School representatives




Let's see. I got back home in the heat of afternoon, with a very bad case of flu and sore throat and cough. I exhausted all of weilip's strepsils and his panadol, and then fell asleep for 14 hours straight, woke up to eat, and went back to sleep for another 5 hour nap.

As of now, that is the most memorable. Falling very sick at pre-u sem of all times. Really, some times I think my body's playing little tricks on me.

But anyway, there were really cool moments in the seminar when I wasn't too sick to enjoy really corny jokes or meet totally cool new friends, or just enjoy the stimulating environment dominated by occasional prejudices that were sometimes a little cold and unwarranted. But hey, we learn that the world ain't fair, and we live by that and around that as much as we can.

In a way I sort of understand the bitterness. It was really apparant when the common thread of discussion was pretty personal, and I guess everyone's entitled to their own personal views, however angry or bitter.

5 things I love about Pre-u seminar:


#5
More good years, staying together or moving ahead?
I guess what made the whole seminar infinitely more enjoyable were the political puns my dear group 13 made during our group discussions and parallel presentations. It seriously brightened the whole political environment; all that contesting seats (in the bus) and having "walkovers" and "more good years". Teddy presented his paradox of the day on day 2 when we couldn't decide whether to eat or have personal time first: should we stay together or move ahead? (:


swapping blazers! (:


tea with minister..
#4
Having 6 meals a day: breakfast, tea, lunch, break, dinner, supper. The food was not bad. It was oily, it was average, but it was a buffet, so that implies choice. And besides, the operator of the canteen was none other than hercules' aunt! How can you not admire the far-reaching connections of our future leader of Singapore? (:


this is hercules goofing about again. He's hercules cos he could break the door handle of his room and then get stuck lol. Priceless.


our guys


the girls!


GROUP13! And we all say... "oh mannn. GG. so coool..."


#3
Holding onto the coolio transponder, made going to my claustrophobic room more exciting. Ok I'm a techno-noob, but still.. And we had single occupancy rooms! How sad was that. I wasn't really used to the whole sleeping alone in a room concept, so I kept my door open most of the time, so anyone walking along mostly gave me weird looks. I guess I'm not used to privacy.

Lucky for denise, who was just next door. I had someone to hang out with who was totally like me, in more ways than one (: I hung out with her at night when we talked and talked and tried to do our script (me). Heard of a little nj scandals haha. ;) It was cool. And for people I could sms through panel discussions (TANNEH hehe) and those who called at night when the room was so silent (wally, darrell).




the hall way.


#2
The games, the bonding, sem group 13
Wow my group was great. We've got such a cool mix of people from everywhere. NY, Nj, Rj, SR, PJ, MI... And somehow everyone just clicked from day 1 at ice breakers. We were discussing hot dudes and chio girls, and all that truth and dare. Our SLOs- Jessica our mother hen and Daniel, provider of famous amos cookies and coffee bean brownies (:


daniel prata stoning (:


an omen! the expiry date from my pandan cake.. On teddy's arm now haha.

#1
The people. Just them. The friends we make that we'll keep in contact with, and that we've treasured for the 5 days. Imagine politics with boring people. (shudder) Then add the lame jokes, the cool attitudes, the open minds, and you get broader horizons. Yeah, definitely more good years ahead..




haha my two ang baos and me




Introducing my twin! There were 2 different people who came up to us to ask us if we were twins lol! (: Yay denise..





ok at first we didn't look alike. Then gradually...


ok not so here either.. but it was only day2!




What is uber cool is that she's a tracker (like my sis), and her sis 2 years her junior is in dance! Some coincidence man..





cheryl me christine denise!


wally me


teddy weilip kaiyang


errol enos wally







The PICTURES.
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