in a little of an odd mood now.

i spent my today in the library trying to figure unbiased estimators. i couldn't..so i just skimmed through the notes smirking over the ridiculous sounding math relationships.

the sole joy i gleamed was reading the 4 poems in the Ariel anthology. I can read it all day and still have more to learn.

and nyapping with tanneh and lip.(: i haven't been laughing much i realise.

have been coughing and sneezing. i hate my immune system. i thought to give it a chance to redeem itself, so i haven't been to the doctor's since end June when i got the flu, and now it has manifested itself into coughing fits. and when i got back i had fever. so i just watched chinese news to scare the germs away.

it was scary. i was trying to get into the mind of plath on my way back, what with dying being an art and all. then i saw a police van and a couple of undertakers on my way back. ):

and then when i was buying my good ol water chestnut from the nice uncle, he was updating me on another death along the overhead bridge near my school. apparently a guy went up the roof and it was slippery and then the branches hit him and he fell and died. ):

then i read LIFE tonight and there's this China girl paralysed neck down, pleading for the right to kill herself.

man, a day in the life of the sick. tis terrible.

but no morbid thoughts! they circled more randomly along deep armchairs and pleasant curtains of the Old Home, then to some random farmhouse in australia (which I miss terribly); and the geniality, the dignity, the lack of urbanity which are the offspring of privacy and space.

i need some form of clarity. my room was in a total mess (like my life hurhur) and i had a weird compulsion to grab my yoghurt and plonk down, listen to kevin kern the good man, and read the nearest copy of virginia woolf.

Why are women so much more interesting to men than men are to women?

What had our mothers been doing then that they had no wealth to leave us? Powdering their noses?

Hurhurhur.